Tag Archives: books

How to get the best from visiting a wedding fair

Photo by Tara Winstead on Pexels.com

Wedding fairs are wonderful things – there’s so much excitement, so many gorgeous suppliers to visit – plus more often than not there’s cake! Going to a wedding fair can often be the moment that the wedding starts to feel real – and it can begin to feel a little bit overwhelming. The key is to find a balance between having a great day out, and gathering information and inspiration to make your wedding day exactly what you want it to be. This article is all about how to get the best from your day, plus a little bit of insight into how a wedding reading by Kathryn Anna Writes Bespoke can make your day even more special.

  1. Think about the type of wedding fairs you visit

There are hundreds of wedding fairs all over the country, ranging from huge wedding expos to intimate showcases. It can be tricky to decide which type will work for you. If time and money are unlimited then I’d say it’s worth going to several different types of events. If you are a little pressed for time and cash, then I’d recommend going to an event at a venue that’s on your shortlist. This gives you a great opportunity to meet local suppliers, and to get a feel for how your venue runs big events.

2. Make a list

You’ll have many, many lists. Possibly lists of lists (if you’re not sure where to start download my free wedding planner timeline here). Making a list of suppliers to see or things to find ideas for will give you a focus for the day and help you plan your time. When you’re in the thick of the excitement it can be easy to get distracted and miss the supplier you really want to see – having them on your list will be a gentle reminder that you don’t need to spend your whole day chatting to the charming table sash supplier.

3. Take a look at suppliers’ websites

Most suppliers will have a website. Looking at what they offer before you go to your next wedding fair will give you chance to think about what you want to ask and who you really want to see.  Crowds of people and talking to folk you don’t know can phase even the most confident people – having a few questions up your sleeve will help you get the best from your day.

4. Keep focused on what you want your wedding day to be – but have a little wiggle room

Some things about your wedding day will be non-negotiable – and that’s a whole other blog post – but some things can be super flexible and it’s often these little details that will make your day feel special. Wedding fairs are super places to pick up ideas for things you may not have thought of and a chance to meet suppliers who really “get” what you want your day to be.

5. Remember to have fun

I love attending wedding fairs – being a writer is a solitary sort of job so it’s wonderful to get out and talk to so many excited families. The one thing that makes me sad is when I can see people are really stressed by the whole thing. Organising a wedding is a big deal but there’s lots of fun to be had along the way. Make wedding fair day a day to celebrate by booking brunch before you go (not bottomless or you’ll end up booking a coach and horses by accident!) or going out for a coffee at your favourite café afterwards. Try your best to enjoy every moment – it’s all part of creating a day that is something you’ll cherish and remember for the rest of you lives together.

What Kathryn Anna Writes Bespoke can bring to your wedding

One of the things I hear most when people see my bespoke wedding poetry at a wedding fair is “I’d never thought of that” – and I’m never surprised. Amongst thinking about what everyone will eat, what you’ll all wear, what flowers to have, things like readings and speeches get a bit lost. This is exactly why you need me (😊) I write beautiful poetry built around what’s important to you. These are perfect for a meaningful wedding reading, memorable speech or simply a thoughtful thank you for the people who’ve been an important part of your day. I love writing them, and I know people love reading them. Get in touch today and keep an eye on my social media pages to see when I’m next at a fair.

Happy planning!

Until next time,

Kathryn

Words for Weddings

how personalised wedding poetry can make your wedding feel just right

People will forget what you said, forget what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel – Maya Angelou

This magnificent quote from Maya Angelou is well known. That doesn’t make it any less powerful and when it comes to planning your wedding day it’s worth keeping it in mind. It’s easy to get so caught up in the material things and logistics of the day that the way the day will make people feel can fall to the wayside.

Now, only you know what impression you want people to have from your wedding. You may want them to think “they’re experts in bringing together a theme” or “they have such quirky taste”. My guess (and it is just a guess!) is that you also want people to remember a sense of love, joyful relationships, and confident bliss. Your wedding day is one of the happiest days of your life, and that’s not just because of a great cake or cool table centres. I mean it could be. But I’m guessing not.

How to create the wedding atmosphere you want

So how can you get everyone feeling as loved up as the bridal party?  Well getting the basics right is good – great food, gorgeous surroundings, welcoming environment all get people in the mood for tapping into their sensitive side. Once you’ve got the basics covered, it’s time to delve into your creativity. These creative touches bring your day to life and make it absolutely yours. Here’s some of the best ideas I’ve seen lately

Magical music

Music is such a huge part of the day – from walking down the aisle to dancing under the stars, music will weave through your day. It’s a hugely personal thing and the main thing to remember is to balance between showcasing the tunes you adore and giving everyone else a chance to indulge their dancing feet, or simply relax in the moment. If you’ve a favourite band or singer you want to play at your big day, make sure to secure their date as  soon as you can – the very best do get booked up quickly and missing out can have a real impact.

Photo by Alejandro Avila on Pexels.com

Words for weddings

Speeches, readings, vows – words thread through your day almost unnoticed. Something that has struck me since I began writing personalised wedding poems is how often my customers tell me that their guests have gone out of their way to say how much they loved them. Whilst I’d like to think this is about my beautiful writing, I know it’s about more than that. The bespoke poems I create encapsulate a couple’s relationship and who they are as people. It’s like a bite size treasure of the people that mean so much to them and something that’s a joy to hear.

Cool wedding guest books

The days of a formal guest book are dwindling and there are so many fab ideas. One of my favourites is this fab Lego guest book – each guest makes their own mini figure and writes their name – so interactive. I can’t quite run to a suite of lego figures reciting poems, but I do offer a cool variation on the guest canvas. Your personalised wedding poem becomes a stunning memento of your day complete with well wishes from your loved ones. It’s a real heirloom piece, and just like everything I offer the words, images and design are completely bespoke.

Get in touch

Obviously, I’d like everyone reading this to commission a bespoke poem, but because I’m a micro business, not a big ole Etsy rent-a-craft set up (yep Etsy’s changed!). I mostly want you to choose words for your wedding that mean the world to you. It can be song lyrics, a passage from a book, quote from a film, the first words you said when you met…whatever you choose, make sure it’s magical – and if you like I can make it part of a beautiful poetry print for you to love forever.

A little update

Hello! I hope you’re all well and enjoying the first signs of spring – I have daffodils poking up all over the place and the birds are definitely pairing up – I fear I may have pigeon wars again this year.

If you’ve been a subscriber to Kathryn Anna Writes for some time (thank you!) you’ll have noticed some changes to my content over the last few months. In an attempt to streamline things a little, and also to be part of the growing community of writers and thinkers on Substack, I’ve switched some of my more writerly content away from this website to make space for more about my new venture writing personalised wedding poems and making poetry prints. My initial idea was to copy all my new musings over to here, then I remembered Google hates (and I mean hates) duplicate content, so I’ve had to make the decision to make a more definite split.

I’ll still be posting updates and news on here, but any longer essays and poetry film are on my new(ish) publication This Wild Feeling. I’d love it if you’d join me over there (it’s completely free) and I’m ever grateful for your continued support, which ever platform you choose to use stay in touch.

Until next time,

Kathryn

xx

How I’m weaning myself off social media

If you’ve had chance to read my post Getting my act together, you’ll already know I’ve reached a point of reset in my career. I have many aspects to work on and one of the most immediate is to change my relationship with social media.

I realised towards the end of last year that social media was having a negative influence on my brain, specifically my attention span. I’ve never been a person who’s chased “likes” or found myself seething with jealousy at Fifi’s news that she has a new sofa (I adore seeing folk’s happy holiday photos and joyful pets) but I am increasingly aware that at best I don’t enjoy the time I spend on social media and at worst my attention span has significantly decreased.

My moment of clarity came after reading a brilliant article by Tom Cox which summed up my feelings with aplomb.

Social media has long been a useful way for writers to reach readers but it’s also more dominantly a way for writers to reach people with attention spans like grated parmesan who are too psychically oppressed by social media to read books any more.

Why not just delete my account

The simplest thing would be to leave the various platforms. Unfortunately as a writer and a small business, I rely on social media to gather readers and customers. Algorithms and advertising are making this increasingly ineffective and I intend to find other avenues for publicity but for now, a social media presence is still necessary.

How I’m weaning myself off social media

My first step in weaning myself off social media was to think about why I use it.

As a person with M.E. the most challenging symptoms are poor stamina and brain fog. One of the techniques I use for day-to-day living is to schedule frequent breaks (this is a lot more annoying than it sounds). If I’m writing, or doing domestic tasks like cleaning, cooking, or gardening I set an alarm to give myself a ten-minute break every forty minutes. Typically, I’ll go and scroll through Facebook or Instagram, watching reels of dubious comedy value or scant public interest. More and more I’ve been using this as my primary form of relaxation.  Ten years ago, I’d have picked up a book or magazine.

What I gain from scrolling social media is a sense of escape, a sense of time out from my day. It’s a habit and habits can be shifted.

What I am using to replace social media

My second step has been to consider what to replace my scrolling with. If I’m physically tired and beset by porridge brain, then choosing a hefty intellectual book may not meet my need. This is expressed brilliantly by Roz Goddard in Poetry Projects to Make and Do

Currently my addiction to soft-boiled crime fiction is telling me I’m feeling overwhelmed in my life and need to carve out the time to enter the world of forensic archaeology, sand dunes and peril that isn’t my own.

Poetry Projects to Make and Do published by Nine Arches Press

My first major change was to stop reading books I felt would add gravitas to my online persona and return to reading books I enjoy. I feel a little embarrassed to write this– a little exposed – but honesty is the key to everything and if this article is to be of any value, I need to show how entrenched I had become in the creation of a curated life. The pressure to read books that impress, rather than books that bring joy is another consequence of the grip social media has on my inner as well as outer life.

Since I’ve made this decision I’ve enjoyed reading, laughed, cried, looked up new words, finished a book in a day, read another in tiny fragments because it moved me so much and flicked through a magazine with a lightness no stream of targeted ads could possibly deliver.

Create physical barriers

The third step was to think about the times when I don’t feel such a pressure to “check my phone.”

The answer (as it is to so many things) is when I’m gardening. My fear of dropping my phone (or flinging it into the compost bin where so many gardening gloves meet their doom) combined with a pair of slightly tricky to remove gardening shoes mean I rarely take my phone outside. Gardening is an activity that remains blissfully free of a social filter, apart from posting (too) many photos of flowers.

Having established that physical distance is a decent deterrent I’ve started leaving my phone upstairs when I’m not actively using it to post an ad for my business or respond to emails. Adding an extra action means an extra stage of thought (a bit like putting biscuits in a higher cupboard). I’ve also gone back to using recipe books, to avoid the five minutes scroll while the onions brown (or burn!). Instead, I sit out in the yard and listen, or look out of the window at everything I often fail to see. A mini meditation, with a backdrop of not letting the onions go too crispy.

Pay attention to how I feel

My final action is to pay attention to how I feel. I check in with myself after reading or a few minutes sitting and absorbing my surroundings and note any physical changes. The words I keep writing are “my breath feels more open.” This isn’t the best sentence in the world but what I think I mean is that I am more relaxed, my breathing is deeper – I am more peaceful. The words I write after spending extended time on social media are “my shoulders hurt” and “I feel tense.” I know which set of feelings I prefer.

Nothing new…

I’m very aware that none of these techniques are groundbreaking or particularly amazing. What is amazing is the impact I’ve felt after just a week. I am more inclined to read and more disciplined about the amount of time I spend on my phone. I also realise how much of my own life I’ve spent on this pocket-sized tyrant. Having a chronic illness like M.E. means I have limited energy so why the blazes have I chosen to slip into advertiser driven inertia? I’ve got around 20-30 good years left at best and I don’t want to spend any more of them in a state of passive consumption, hoping that someone, somewhere notices what I’ve posted online. I need to find better ways of making myself feel good, heard, and valuable.

In many ways, writing on Substack has potential to rekindle that sense of community I felt during the early days of social media. Having M.E. and living in a semi-rural environment means I’m pretty isolated. I’m also in possession of a personality that means small talk and chattering crowds leave me unnerved and hollow. I frequently say the wrong thing in the wrong place and have a knack for talking too seriously at parties. Substack offers small, focused communities that I feel brave enough to speak in. So far, I’ve encountered people like 

Kathryn Vercillo who are passionate about creativity and mental health, people like 

Dave Bonta who spend time reading and sharing fabulous array of poetry blogs and people like 

lucy sweet whose Lucyverse more than meets my need for satire, and laugh out loud weirdness. In short, I’ve encountered writers, artists and thinkers eager to share, learn and just enjoy being.

This seems to be a place I can talk about books and poetry, a place where I can read about things got that are going on in the world without the pile on of anger and self righteous opinion. I can read long form intelligent, amusing essays written for the joy of writing, rather than attention-grabbing soundbites. I’m weaning myself off the petrol dopamine hit, the sugar rush content and finding true nourishment. I feel I’m getting part of myself back.

Thank you so much for reading – I hope this has been useful, if only to make you feel glad you have a healthier relationship with social media than I do! In my next article I’ll be looking at how I’m trying to silence my “who’s going to listen to you” voice and assuming I manage to keep away from the temptation of life hack reels, I’ll have another poetry film ready for you to enjoy on Friday

Poetry Film

KATHRYN ANNA MARSHALL

·

APRIL 13, 2023

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Until next time

Kathryn

xx