A game of two halves……

Two football references in one year. My goodness. I’ve little else have to say on the subject, but I am struck by what a lovely World Cup I’ve had. I’m reaching the point where I feel I can finally call myself a writer. This is tremendous on so many levels.

Anyone who’s been out of work, whether through ill health or other circumstances will empathise with the dread of being asked and the shame of having to respond to the question “what do you do?”. It is very good not to have to explain and mumble away my life anymore.

I am still learning how much I can do, and as ever I struggle to say no to work. Sadly it’s not a simple case of ” if I have a job I find I can get up in the morning” as has been speculated. If it was, I’d have been still been employed in the wonderful world of NVQ assessment and training after all. The challenge is balance, and learning the boundaries of my body and brain. I’m getting there, but the fear of pushing too hard and causing a major relapse is still present, but I’m working closely with my occupational therapist to make sure I don’t put myself at risk. As someone who likes things to be black and white all this grey area is difficult. Nonetheless, work I’m producing as a copywriter is successful,my editor is very happy and I enjoy what I do.

Creative work is going well too. I’m loving the course I’m doing with The Poetry School, it’s challenging and pushing me in new directions, which is exactly what I wanted. I’ll write a full post when I’ve completed the course.

I’ve finished my first six poems for Primers scheme, and I’ll know in September whether I’ve made the shortlist. If (and it’s a big if) I am successful, then I’ve to produce another fifteen pieces of work. I think my chances are slim this year, but the discipline of having something to aim for is giving me structure.

This has been a year of two halves (😉) and I wouldn’t have believed how much things can change just by reassessing and changing a few things that were making me sad more than they made me happy.

Hoorah for good friends and family.