The pressure to be positive. 

I try to keep this blog positive. No one likes to read something that makes them miserable, and I certainly don’t like to write it. Unfortunately, the danger of being positive, especially online is that an illusion of perfection is created. I don’t want to do that. 

M.E. is a foul thief of life. It is not nice. It is not easy. It is certainly not something I would choose. 

And I feel uncomfortable writing that. 

Will you think I’m looking for pity? Sympathy? A pat on the head and a big well done? I hope not. The reality is that I have to be positive, or I would not carry on ploughing through the days when I can’t dress, can’t wash, can’t cope with listening to the radio.  I have to be positive, to allow me to empathise with the utter lack of understanding,and occasional ignorance. Forgive for the times when I lapse, and feel the need to mention that it’s not easy. Forgive me also for “banging on” about M.E., it’s a constant companion unfortunately. I know I am lucky, and I have always been a counter of blessings, but sometimes, the pressure to pretend all is peachy is a little overwhelming. Having friends it’s safe to be weak in front of is a precious thing. Having friends who allow me to feel sad and frustrated about things is more precious still. 

Normal cheery service will resume next week. Honest.